The Dreaded Phone Call

***Long post ahead***

Last Saturday as usual we were at the home to visit dad.

This time he was significantly weak and lethargic. He could still speak but his voice was barely audible. It was hard to understand what he was saying. He appeared extremely sleepy but he tried to keep his eyes open. We assured him that is was alright for him to sleep.

I knew that the time was near. I held his hand and I gently told him that he has nothing to worry about and I assured him that my brothers and I will always take good care of mum. Pa, go in peace and when you see the light, follow it. He nodded. 

Prior to our visit that week, the home administrator called me on Wednesday morning to inform me that dad's blood pressure was not registering on the monitor. That was the first indication that dad was slipping away. 

Then Friday I contacted the helper to find out how dad was doing. He told me that dad could no longer eat but he could still take small amounts of fluids. He was also having what is known as end of life visions. I was deeply saddened.

That evening I hugged my partner and had a good cry. He cried too, recalling his own personal loss of beloved family members.

After our Saturday visit, we had lunch at Kar Hiong. The mood was somber.

Mum said dad was not likely to last beyond midnight Sunday. This may well be our last meal at Kar Hiong.

Back at the office, I made sure that I completed whatever jobs and administrative matters that were pending in view of what may come the following week.

That very evening as my partner and I were about to sleep the phone call came. I jumped up from bed and sure enough it was the home admin calling to inform me that dad was gone. 

So we quickly got ourselves dressed up to go to the home. This was the sequence of events :

10:14 pm Call came in to inform that dad had passed away.

10:20 pm The home helper called to inform me of the same.

10:23 pm I called my brother to tell him that our dad had passed.

10:26 pm I texted my other brother. 

10:27 pm I attempted to call Nirvana hotline to request assistance. All I got was an automated message telling me to call back during office hours. The emergency line yielded no response. Haiz! 

10:32 pm On the way to the home, I sent a text message to the Nirvana group that my late friend set up back in 2023.

10:58 pm The helper called again to inform me that the ambulance had arrived and that the medical officer had issued a note confirming death. I was to collect and bring the note to the police station to make a report and to secure a burial permit.

Past 11:00 pm We arrived at the home. I went to my dad's room to look at him. He was covered in a white blanket. I pulled back the blanket.

Dad looked peaceful, as if he were asleep. His eyes were closed and his mouth slightly open. I touched his forehead and it was still warm. I whispered to him, Pa, go in peace and follow the light. It is believed that the soul still lingers, so just in case lah, must say something. I was surprisingly calm.

Then my partner and I made our way to the police station. We were there for about an hour or so. By that time I received a response from the Nirvana team.

Finally past midnight, the burial permit was issued but not before the police sergeant (who dashed up to the home to investigate and confirm that death was due to natural causes) asked me some questions. He sent me off with condolences and my partner and I dashed back to the home.

There we waited for the two Nirvana agents who arrived shortly. Together we waited for the van to arrive to transport dad's remains to the Nirvana HQ at Sg Besi.

The van arrived at 12:43 am with three personnel. Before they took dad out, one of the agents advised me to go inside and "talk to your father" to inform him that he was going to be transported to Nirvana Sg Besi.

Apparently, this procedure (to those who believe) is to make sure that the soul follows along with the body. I am an avid horror movie fan, but at that moment, I was all calm and collected. 

It was about 1:00 am when we all left. Later that morning my family and I were to meet with the bereavement coordinator and agents for the final arrangements.

What a day and what an experience!