Friday, 14 March 2025

The Wake

Monday afternoon was the wake. My brother, our mum and I arrived at the venue an hour earlier.


This is our first experience with Nirvana. The parlor was very neatly and beautifully organized. The Nirvana Shah Alam center has 7 parlors if I am not mistaken. 

We have been to other wakes which all had a very eerie feel. This one, I told my brother, looked more like our MIA seminar room held at hotels hah..hah...


There were condolence flowers received from me and my brothers'/sister-in-law's associates.


As the afternoon progressed, our acquaintances started arriving to pay their last respects. Family members and relatives showed up a bit later.


Light refreshments were served.


My late friend, Tan Lee Kim (from whom I purchased this bereavement package two years ago), told me that the Nonya kueh served by Nirvana are very good.  

Well, although I resolved not to eat any kueh, ultimately I did have two packs because I was hungry. My partner remarked, eh! you eat carbo! Well...

The kueh were good but I could not help comparing them to authentic Nonya Kueh of old (which were awesome and now hard to come by).


At the meeting on Sunday, we were informed that because we shortened the wake from 2 days to 1 day, the pau that was scheduled to be served on day 2 would be served on day 1 as well. 

There were 4 types of pau - red bean, pandan kaya, chicken and curry chicken. I didn't eat any but my mum told me that the red bean (not too sweet) and curry chicken pau were very good,


Bottled water and ground nuts were also served. 


For hot beverages, there was coffee (Kopi O) and tea, with sugar and creamer provided on the side.

I told my brother it would be nice if they had those coffee machines like the ones at our MIA seminars heh..heh... My brother and I would have had a field day (and so would some of our guests too).


This is how it looked like inside the parlor. The casket was behind the altar.


Dad was quite the handsome fella when he was young.

I am taking a leaf out of my late grandma's books.  She once said, when you die, don't use the photo from your actual age because you would be all wrinkled and not so good looking hah..hah... Use the photo from your younger days when you looked more presentable. So.

I was very calm until my Tua Pek (dad's eldest brother) entered the parlor where he broke down and cried. That's when the floodgates burst. I was very affected and I too shed tears.


This is my mum, taking a loving look at dad. Mum took his passing quite well. She nursed him for 23 years ever since he was diagnosed with cancer in 2001.

Dad was very blessed to have a personal nurse (it pays to marry a nurse), trained in Scotland some more. Without mum's dedicated and loving care, I doubt if dad could have lived so long. 

The wake ended before 10:00 pm when our relatives made a move to let mum go home and rest before the funeral the next day.

12 comments:

  1. My deepest condolences to you PH for the passing of your beloved dad. Stay strong and take care.

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  2. You have chosen a very nice photo of your late father 👍
    I must say nirvana shah alam is nicer than the HQ at sungai besi, shah alam got nice green garden view outside.
    Wah, your elder uncle must be quite advanced in age so he must be so very sad. 😭

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    1. I agree with you, I prefer the Shah Alam center. My elder uncle is 90+ and still in good health. I want to be like him.

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  3. I thought your dad will be having a Christian ceremony? I think the Nirvana Shah Alam is one of the latest locations which my grandma last resting place is here as well.

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    1. My dad was a free thinker so we got him the free thinker package. I like the Shah Alam Nirvana and I am glad I chose that location.

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  4. Be brave Phong, you be alright.
    Rest in peace to your beloved Dad.
    According to one’s beliefs, your Dad is in heaven surrounded by deceased loved ones.
    If you believe in reincarnation, he has finished one cycle of reincarnation & will be reborn with a new purpose according to his soul calling.

    Some interesting articles according to a psychic
    https://www.erinpavlina.com/blog/2010/05/do-the-dead-miss-us/

    https://www.erinpavlina.com/blog/2025/03/loved-one-at-peace/

    https://www.erinpavlina.com/blog/2021/07/this-is-what-happens-when-you-ask-deceased-loved-ones-to-send-you-a-sign/


    Remember the love you shared with your dad.

    I dedicate two songs to you
    Phil Collins - You'll Be In My Heart with Lyrics
    https://youtu.be/git6DCXSqjE?si=1ckqs8kTrPyj0MiM


    To Where You Are (Lyrics) - JOSH GROBAN
    https://youtu.be/JKvR9W3JMp4?si=ZmeWECb4NZ2R3772



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    1. Thank you so much, Eli for your very warm kind words and for taking the time to share those links with me.

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  5. Thanks for the photos of the wake. I've never been to Nirvana-type wake and I must say the place is beautifully organised...not eerie at all (like you said). The other non-eerie experience is a church funeral (which I've been to mostly). The layout with light refreshments do make me think of seminars...lol. I see there are many "rooms" available next to each other. When you bought the bereavement package from TM, was all this included or you need to pay for these services separately? Glad everything went well. You take care now, PH.

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    1. Most welcome, I wanted to show how Nirvana package looks like for people considering arranging bereavement package for either themselves or their loved ones. The package is all in, no extra charges unless if you want something extra not specified in the package. Having multiple rooms next to each other does have some "disadvantage" because their program could be very "noisy" LOL!

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  6. As this Nirvana-type of wake is indoor and the place is brightly lit and neatly organised, so it does not feel eerie at all. I see that the room to pay the last respects to your daddy is partitioned and separated from the room/place to eat the refreshments with tables and seats. Good that you stayed calm and composed. All is well ends well. Stay strong and positive moving forward PH though it is not easy. No matter what in your heart, he is always your most handsome and beloved dad.

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    1. Auwww... Libby, you are so sweet! Thank you. I am still sad and will stay so for a while. I have no regrets because my family and I gave the best that we could possibly have done for dad.

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