Thursday 9 February 2023

To Marry or NOT?

I received not very positive news regarding my dad's medical condition. The doctors are now figuring out how to resolve the issue.

Of course I am very concerned and worried. But all is in God's hands and I will pray and ask for divine assistance. Whatever will be will be.

Life goes on and I will carry on doing what I have to do. 

So. Makan!

I got tired of meat - what they call meat aversion. I also did not feel like having fish or chicken. I needed to eat something different but with minimum carbs.

I went to Red Kettle and ordered me a Latte and Porkie Eggie Benedict.

The Latte was so good! Muah! The Porkie Eggie Benedict was nyums!

I was there early because I was very hungry in spite of having a very filling dinner of beef trimmings the evening before.

Now that Chinese New Year is over, the concourse has been taken over by all these wedding stuff. Are the coming months the usual time for people to get hitched?

Gorgeous, eh? But I have always had my feet rooted to the ground and never once dreamt of wearing a beautiful wedding gown and be feted like a princess for a day.

After all, once the wedding reception is over and the pomp and pageantry die down, you and your groom are just two ordinary people navigating life. It could be the "end" of your life as you knew it.

I am not against marriage, not at all. I just choose to stay legally untethered so that I can maintain my autonomy and not be bound by any duties and liabilities that I am unwilling to shoulder. Yes, I am selfish. But I don't care, my life, my choice. I am happy the way that I am.

So parents, if your daughter is financially independent and she is still unmarried (by choice or whatever), fret not. If she is happy where she is, just let her be. Don't keep lecturing her to get married or try to set her up with somebody.

Looking on the positive side, with her single status, she can afford to spend more time and pay more attention to you in your golden years.

In my case, my single brother is doing a brilliant job housing my parents and seeing to their needs. I play a small part and give support wherever and whenever needed.

This is a quote from Dr Wee Wei Ling, daughter of the late Lee Kuan Yew :

Said Dr Lee: "Papa, I know you would have preferred if I had married and had children.

But I have no regrets, no regrets I was able to look after you and Mama in your old age."

One bloody busybody once asked me, "Oh, if you are not married and have no children, who is going to look after you when you are old?"

Well, even if I had children, I would make sure that I am financially capable (and of course take care of my health as far as I can) so as to not burden my children. I don't want to depend on or burden anyone to look after me in my old age.

Why am I being so preachy today? Must be the darn carbohydrates I ate just now. 

Anyway, just so you know, I might not be updating my blog for a while. I will see you when I see you. Take care!


  1. You take good care too! Two of my siblings are not married and one sibling just got divorced so feel free to be single, it is your own and nobody's else business. I pray that the doctors will figure out what to do and give you all good advice for you all to make a decision. Please take good care! ๐Ÿ™

  2. Your 'preaching' aligns with my thinking/belief. Take care and see u again, soon!

  3. Gosh!!! That wedding dress in the first pic is absolutely gorgeous!!! Too bad my girl is not showing any sign of wanting to get married or I would go and buy that for her right away!!! Yes, I just let her be - fine by me.
    Hope your dad will get through it all, God bless, all. Be strong!!!

    1. Ah, the loving and hopeful papa! Thank you!

  4. You take care over there. Hope your dad's condition is getting better. My prayer for him and your family. God bless you all.

  5. Aiyah, your post title very misleading lah....hah..hah! :D From my experience, I notice that couples who meet late in their lives or if one party has been married before, there's usually no second marriage (like some of my friends). Everyone has the right to choose their "status" and as long as he or she is happy, that's what matters. P/S: You have my prayers and hope that your dad's medical condition will resolve and improve.

  6. PH, please take good care of yourself too. My prayers are with you and hopefully your health condition dad will improve.

  7. Totally agreed! My advice to my daughter is I provide everything you need to financially and mentally independent and my only request for them is to live happily according to their wisdom of life but that do not include marriage. I will never ask them whether they will have boyfriend or not, they will let know if they think they need to let me know. On the other note, I told them what I have is not what they will have and on the other hand, I will try not to depend on them when I am enter into my old age (of course they are no absolute answer for this, but I will try whatever mean no to bother them). The above is only my own perception on the above-mentioned topic and do not represent public view.

    1. Your thinking is like mine! I agree with your thoughts 100%.

  8. I am married for 10 years and boom.... suddenly I am single again... I have a long term partner and I do not intend to get married again. Let's shake hands... I mean about the not-marrying part! hahaha.... Just stay healthy and happy!

    1. Ah, life has many surprises for us. I am happy that you have a long term partner in your life. As long as we are happy as a couple, that is all that matters!