Thursday 18 January 2024

When Dad Upsets You

It was visiting day at the nursing home (one of our twice weekly visits) and dad was being particularly difficult.

We learnt from the staff that dad refused to be moved out of his room (the day before) to enable the contractor to install a new set of blinds in his room. The old set fell off the previous week when a staff attempted to lower the blinds.

All attempts to persuade him failed and the contractor had no choice but to leave. So I tried to explain to dad that in order for the blinds to be installed, he has to temporarily vacate his room. But he raised his voice and made very irrelevant and unreasonable arguments. So I left the room. Or else I might say something that I may regret later.

It was frustrating. Dad is still lucid and mentally alert. His cognitive function is still very much intact. But his attitude and inflexible views simply drives everyone up the wall including the nurses at the hospital and even the cardiologist. Not to mention my poor mother who nursed him (and put up with his behavior) for the past 23 years.

Sorry for the rant. He can live without window blinds for all I care. His choice. 

So after this particularly aggravating event, I simply had to chill out with good food. In the past I would have stuffed my face with carbs and desserts. Not anymore. 

So around 12:30pm I arrived at my favorite makan place.


Adoi. So crowded. My favorite table was occupied and I had to take the one right outside the toilet.


Not very auspicious. So I sat with my back facing the loo. With impeccable timing, Donald served me my favorite drink.


Ah! A very good mug of Kopi C Ais Kosong to soothe my nerves. It took quite some time for the duck to be served as they were very busy.


The best time to eat this is at 11:00am + when the skin is still crispy and the meat warm and juicy. Today I noticed that the price of the duck went up byRM2.00.

Well, these days, tell me what hasn't increased in price? My partner has been complaining that the price of fried rice and fried noodles has been escalating every time he tapau food.


The duck was a bit on the dry side especially the breast portion. But I still enjoyed my meal. I think my mood improved after that.


Since I was sitting right at the back, I noticed that they have wine glasses. Maybe at night got minum-minum session, who knows.


At the payment counter I saw this Chinese New Year menu. You can find out more on Twins Signature Roast Duck Facebook page.


Then at The Starling I saw people queueing up to eat poison sugar, I mean ice cream. That would have been the soothing balm for my frazzled nerves once upon a time. Now it is duck and coffee hah..hah..hah...

10 comments:

  1. I can tell you what hasn't increased in price, which is my salary...... ~>_<~

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  2. ๐Ÿ˜… It is sad to hear about your dad being difficult and throwing tantrums. I believe his frustration built up over the months affecting his mental health. I also faced the worst mental health issues at times and could only cry to sleep. Then I remembered my mum's bed ridden years which made her mood lousy and cranky. I was advised to rub different essential oils to calm and soothe her. My mum told me she felt happy and rejuvenated after smelling the different oils that I dabbed on her head and all over till her feet. So nowadays I rely on these oils to keep my mood happy.

    I also got a shock to see food prices rising in menus! CNY cookies are the most scary as nothing is less than RM30 per tub. I blame all the previous PMs for not doing the right thing to help our economy. Hope the current govt could do something fast.

    The toilet at Twins Signature Roast Duck is well tiled and very clean. It gave me a surprise when I went to wash my hands. How I wish they could be fully air conditioned!! ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ Donald??

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    1. I know I will kena again if I suggest rubbing essential oils on my dad! LOL! I am glad it worked for you mum but my dad is not so easy to convince.

      I was a bit worried sitting near the toilet and I believe you when you say it is clean because there was no smell coming from there LOL!

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  3. I think because it is near CNY, everything also will increase in price but not sure will they lower the price back to the price before after cny or not.

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    1. I doubt if they will lower the price. Once go up, cannot come down.

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  4. You are so patient with your father. Glad to hear that the duck meal and coffee managed to sooth and give you some comfort.

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    1. I love and respect my father and I would not say anything to hurt his feelings even though I feel like giving him a lecture! LOL!

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  5. Maybe your dad is having some feelings of resentment of being put in a nursing home. Since he's still mentally alert, this (possible) pent up anger and frustration is quite normal, I think, so they can be a little difficult to handle. I've seen it in my MIL. They feel abandoned that the children (and in this case your mom too) did not choose to nurse him at home but can't understand that it may be too much for the caregivers to handle (especially if they're immobile). This is even more difficult since your mom is still around (my MIL was my FIL's caregiver until he passed). It goes without saying that all elderlies will not like being put in a home. Best to be patient and walk away and not confront himin those circumstances.

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    1. Perhaps. When we first informed him about placing him in the nursing home and why we were doing that, he took it quite well. He understands the strain on mum and also om me and my brother. Even before the home, he can be difficult which I attributed to frustration at not being able to function normally again and being confined to the bed etc. So far his attitude appears to be positive, no major complaints from him except for the incident.

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